4 Ways to Save Your Marriage after Separation

Did you know that between 40% to 50% of marriages in the US end in divorce? An article published by the American Psychological Association highlighted this alarming fact. The article goes on to state that in subsequent marriages, the percentage is even higher.

When things start to fall apart in a marriage, many couples choose a period of separation, rather than opting for divorce straightaway. This gives them time to reflect on their decision. If you are currently in such a situation and wish to save your marriage, here are some things that could help.

1. Don’t Force Anything

When a married couple decides to separate, it is seen quite often that one partner wants a divorce while the other wants the marriage to continue. If you’re the one in a separation who doesn’t want to divorce, the first thing you need to understand is that becoming impatient and resorting to badgering or threats will do more harm than good. The best you can do is show constructiveness by respecting your partner’s choice.

2. Figure Out the Problems

Separations happen because of issues that have been swept under the rug. In fact, many people are caught off-guard when the separation happens. Introspect on your past actions and your spouse’s reactions towards them and you might find these problems.

You can also seek the help of a therapist for this. Relationship counseling can help improve communication between the spouses and uncovering the hidden problems that might have caused one of the spouses to grow frustrated with the relationship.

3. Forgive and Forget

Even if you’re the one that is more committed towards saving the marriage, you might be holding on to some grudges. In order to be a loving and healthily functioning couple again, you must forgive your spouse for any past behavior that you found offensive. Forgiveness is strongly linked to the sense of well-being of a person and increases positive emotions, which helps in improving relations with others, according to a study by the National Center for Biotechnology Information.

4. Set a Deadline

Reach out to your spouse for a friendly talk once you feel you’re ready. Make sure that you don’t seem pushy as you do so. Just be there for them as a friend. As you do so, suggest a deadline to them. Tell them that you’ll do your best to become a better person until that deadline, failing which you won’t bother them again.

The best way to improve your relationship is to have a frame in which you and your spouse can comfortably work together. This will ensure that your significant other doesn’t feel as if things are being rushed, making reconciliation much easier.

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