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Let me start Part Two with a personal story that reflects how traumatic memories are stored differently than ‘regular’ memories and how they can be problematic. My story is more dramatic than many, but nevertheless an example of how all trauma works, whether it be chronic moderate abuse in childhood, or the loss of a…
Editor’s Note: May is National Masturbation Month, but it also seems to be Meditation Month at “The Growing Mind.” Neil Selden has posted a couple of times on meditation recently, I’ve put up two posts, and now our ‘guest contributor’ Michael O. Selden writes an in-depth article for those who really want to get into…
By Margie Nichols, Ph.D. In Part 1 (posted 4/27), I described myths about meditation – that you have to do it for a pretty long time, that you should have a blank mind, and so on. Here’s why meditating – any form you want – helps you, and a little about which type helps with…
“To study the Way is to study the self, to study the self is to forget the self, to forget the self is to be enlightened by all things.” — Dogen, Zen Teacher, 13th Century. I have known people who lived or are living a life of loving-kindness, compassion, justice, joy and peace—what I consider…
By Margie Nichols, Ph.D. Well, it didn’t take long for me to nix the Sinclair Institute DVD idea. For one thing, in the atmosphere of hysteria that surrounds anything combining under-age minor and sex in the same sentence in the U.S., the DYFS fear isn’t all that paranoid. But, more importantly, I realized that I…
By Margie Nichols, Ph.D. The Guttmacher Institute tells us that 13% of teens have had sexual intercourse by age 15, and that by age 18 nearly 60% have. At my sex therapy and research conference two weeks ago, Surgeon General Dr. Jocelyn Elders told us that after a number of years of decline, teen pregnancy…
By Margie Nichols, Ph.D. There’s a word for constant, unmitigated happiness about your life: denial. Barbara Ehrenreich skewers the positive psychology field in her new book “Bright Sided.“ It’s about time. First of all, it’s become a veritable industry, with top motivational speakers making tens of thousands of dollars and books on ‘happiness research’ flying…
VISUALIZING LOVE by Neil Selden 4/10 Talk about the power of visualization! Yearning for the warming and healing presence of all the darlings we know and love, and all the darlings we may never know but wish to love, and so grateful for the yearning… Here’s a recent emanation from my ruminations about how I…
By Margie Nichols, PH.D. Our colleague James Cantor, Ph.D., published a CNN article showing physiological evidence that gay men are not pedophiles. He pointed to differences in brain structure, and differences in “phallometric” response (that’s right, a ‘peter meter’). Gay men’s brains look like those of straight men; both differ from the pedophiles brain in…
By Margie Nichols, Ph.D. Two weeks ago I was at a sex research and therapy conference where multiple speakers extolled the virtues of sexual fantasy – not just for masturbation, but during sex with a partner, shared or not shared with partner. Yesterday in my therapy office I heard yet another distressed woman ‘confess’ that…
